Is your next door neighbour smoking weed? UK tabloid on how to get them in trouble

UK tabloid the Mirror has repeatedly run an article advising upstanding British citizens as to what actions to take if they suspect that their neighbours are smoking the devil’s weed.

“Nightmare neighbours smoking cannabis inside their own homes is a common problem for communities across Britain,” the paper warns ominously, noting that even if you “may not be bothered by what other people get up to in their own homes, there’s no denying the smell can be off-putting.”

Should the nation be focusing on much larger problems? Probably! But that’s not to say one can’t still find time to narc out one’s neighbours.

Here’s what we learned for our next trip to the UK:

If you smell weed, it could be a single smoker or a giant illicit growth op. Who knows!

“The notoriously pungent stench may be a sign of a recreational user smoking the odd joint next door or the drug being grown in large quantities close by,” advises the Mirror.

Your neighbours can not do what they like on their own private property–including the smoking of cannabis

“The possession of cannabis is an offence and will be dealt with by police. It is a widespread issue across the county and we are focusing our resources to target those connected with the cultivation and dealing of the drug to help crackdown on the issue,” a Derbyshire police spokesperson told the Mirror. “We would encourage anyone who suspects drug activity in their community to contact us.”

“Nightmare neighbours smoking cannabis inside their own homes is a common problem for communities across Britain,” the paper warns ominously, noting that even if you “may not be bothered by what other people get up to in their own homes, there’s no denying the smell can be off-putting.”

You can narc out your neighbours anonymously to police and they’ll never know it was you

A police spokesperson told the Mirror that they “wouldn’t say information has come from a neighbour as that narrows it down. We’d just say we received a call about x.” She recommends calling Crimestoppers to anonymously tip off police to pot-smoking neighbours, and admits that such calls may inform the areas patrolled by police.

If you narc them out to their landlord, they might know it was you

“Unlike the police, if you tell your neighbour’s landlord, there’s no guarantee they won’t give away your identity,” warns the Mirror. No word on how to tell if your neighbour’s consumption is recreational or medical, which is now legal in the UK.

Information is also provided as to how to contact the Land Registry to find out the identity of a neighbour’s landlord–noting that it will, however, cost aspiring snitches “a few quid.”